He seems intelligent, and thoughtful, and in his profile, there's a long discussion of how bareback sex is safe, now, in this age of good anti-viral medications. There is even a reference to a website promoting "safe" barebacking.
It's a very dangerous idea.
In the spring of 2008, there was an article about +/- heterosexual couples in Switzerland who practiced unsafe sex, and who had negligible rates of seroconversion. Truth be told, I have a female positive friend who has conceived two children by her negative husband, they were obviously at least sloppy, and he remains negative.
But what happens in a straight couple, married for years is not the same thing as what happens in random encounters between gay men.
It is relatively difficult for straight women to infect men, even compared to the risk of a "bottom" infecting a "top."
The lining of the vagina is much, much tougher and resistant to friction and tearing than the lining of the rectum. Small blood vessels are more protected, and there are fewer lymphoid cells, which is what HIV is looking for.
Different encounters pose different risks. Someone who thinks he's negative, but who was infected last month is a viral bomb, with levels of virus in the stratosphere. Someone infected for years, even not on therapy, poses a risk, but it is less.......and the risk is lower for those on therapy, especially with "undetectable" viral loads, but it is not zero.
I see too many "tops" who have become infected with unprotected sex to be casual about it.
I suspect that many of these cases involve recent seroconversions, but you can't tell who those guys are, until they take a test.
And by then, it's too late.
